Art is...

Art is such a loaded word. No denying I love it... but at times I truly abhor the word. It scares me.
While I made my portfolio these past 2 years, I had many times when I just wanted to close my ears and scream. I see so many young artists painting dark, disturbing images of fear, turmoil, and depression and countless of times was and felt pressured to paint in such a style. I see the work of contemporary artists, with oversimplified, indiscernible compositions and wonder if that is that I have to do to succeed as a 21st century artist. What happened to beauty? Life? love? Where are all of these things in art today?
I am not saying that paintings of disturbing images and messages are necessarily bad. They are how people choose to express themselves. I just wonder why 'professionals' in Art seem to appreciate a painting of a bulimic woman over that of a young mother and child?

........
Okay, on a lighter note. Last sunday, my friends and I went to Irvine Spectrum. As usual, we visited Urban Outfitters to wallow in the prettiness and unaffordableness of most of their products.
I always found myself more drawn to their home furnishing/gadgets&gizmos section than their clothing section. They always have canvases with images of simple, but really pretty art. Whether its photography on canvas or simple paintings done by an unrecognized artist, each artpiece was visually appealing. There would huge canvases depicting city lights, asian-style sakura trees, a couple kissing in a gondola, clouds, blotches of colors, etc.
After seeing these artworks, I realized that I think too much. Always, when I stand in front a blank canvas, I try so hard to create a perfect classical piece or try to put as much deeper meaning into it as possible. Art should just be an expression of your core being. So I've decided to save up as much money as possible, buy myself a bunch of different size canvases and just paint whatever I feel like painting. It doesn't have to be a masterpiece. It doesn't have to have any philosophical or meaningful reason behind it.
Just pick up the brush and let it blossom on the canvas.
Just paint, Claire. Just paint.